21 Days Until Surgery. My Food Addiction.

I know what it is like to be obese.
I know what it is like to be slim and fit.

The truth is that over eating can be an addiction.  I have fought this all my life.  I am sure that is why I don't weigh 300 lbs right now.  Because I have been hard-core fighting this addiction.  Alcoholism, smoking, shopping, gossiping, etc. can all be addictions.  They all work very differently, look different, and have very different consequences.  Food is my addiction.  This surgery is me taking my "alcohol out of the house" or "cutting up my credit cards".

In my experience there is usually some kind of sympathy that comes with addiction.  "Oh poor ________ just can't get a hold of himself".  It's true.  That is what addiction is.  It IS embarrassing to admit that I have a food addiction and that I have allowed to let this consume me.  My way of dealing with emotions is food.  I'm not too proud of that.  And I know when I am obese people treat me differently.  I've gotten less respect and less attention.  It takes longer for people to warm up to me.  Because I have experienced weight loss and gain a few times in my life, I have actually experienced people treating me bad to good and good to bad depending on my weight.   I have eaten a piece of licorice while I was overweight and got sneered at.  I have eaten a piece of licorice as a thin person with no judgement. That is just the society we live in.

There are so many aspects to this.

The people who are obese in this world are usually dealing with some kind of hurt, whether they know it or not.  I was/am.  I think it is the same for every addiction.  I am so happy that now there is this amazing option for me, including the counselling part of it.

The closer I get to this big step, the more I realize this is not going to be an easy journey.  But I'm ready!